About the fears of writing

So, I've been writing on and off for about nine years now and I would like to say that I have everything under control and I know precisely what I'm doing, but it's the complete opposite. I would think that after so many years of writing and sharing my stories, my fear of sharing the novel idea would disappear but again, it's the complete opposite. About six years ago, I was diagnosed with the writing blok and that's when my fear got really strong because I wasn't able to finish any story. And I mean NO story at all. I had a lot of good ideas, I wanted to write, but when it came to actually writing it, I got bored throughout the sixth chapter and gave up. 

I feel like my writing became quite the fearfull little animal you want to cuddle and take care of but it's really easy to get scared and run away. I feel like I need to be careful of my writing and not show my novel idea to everybody because what if I don't finish again? Maybe there's someone out there in the same position and this might help him not feel that bad. So let's examine my fears. 

WHAT IF I DON'T FINISH IT... AGAIN? 

This fear is my favourite because it follows me for a while now and it might not effect anybody else but it's basically the fear of not finishing your story. For me, who has history of not finishing stories, it's quite normal to be afraid that this novel idea that I'm writing may end up in a bin after a couple of chapters. That's why I don't like to talk about my wiriting a lot because than people will get bored and will say: 

They: "Well, what's with that idea about princess? How's it going?" 

Me: "You know, awesome, the characters are developing, the story is gripping..."

They: "So you didn't finish it?"
Me: *hides in the corner* "No, not really."

SO, WHAT'S THE STORY ABOUT? 

Are you as jumpy as me when you hear this question? Honestly, I admire people who can answer this without the swear running down their forehead or without running off. Oh, you're just like me and get anxious when someone asks you about the story you're writing? Well, than welcome to the club! 

I usually end up screaming nouns at the person and than it looks like this: 

They:  So what are you writing about about?

Me: Princess! Magic! Rebel! Evil Guy! *runs off* 

But seriously, summing up your novel in one neat sentence is sooooo hard. Especially when you have no idea what the story is about. I don't know it. I'm just trying to follow the lead and hope it will get me somewhere. Why can't people understand it? 

WRITING... URGH WEIRDO

Yeah, so this happened to me. Apparently you can't impress a guy when you say you're a writer... at least not in Slovakia. Most people will look at you like you've grown another head or something... or they'll ask you why you're wasting your time. That's why I don't tell people about my writing sessions because I'm used to their weird loooks and laughs when really it's just sad because if only they know how awesome it feel to create a new world, they'd be doing it too. 

And this happens also when someone finds out about my blog. In that case I pretend I'm not there... or that they don't talk about me but someone else who passionately blogs about books and writing. 

WHAT IF I'M JUST WASTING TIME? 

I don't know about you, but sometimes when I'm in the middle of the writing session I tend to get writing crisis when I doubt everything I do. 

What if writing is just a waste of time?

Why do I do this? 

Is this some kind of twisted way of running from reality? 

Am I writing because I don't want to grow up?

OMG GROWING UP! 

What if I won't find a decent job?

I'm a mess. 

I need help. 

Thanks a lot novel. 

Yeah, one thought and I'm falling down the spiral of life crisis thoughts about my future and my inner problems because apprently it's all connected. 

WHAT IF MY NOVEL SUCKS?

Sometimes I hate reading books because they remind me of how much I suck at writing. They remind me of succesfull writers who published their novels and I'm not even able to finish the first draft. And if that is horrible. 

Okay, I know, every first draft is horrible, but still. 

What if my novel is terrible? 

What if no one will like my characters? That is if I finish it. 

What if...

It's easy to get tangled up in all those worries about your novel not being as good as someone else's but it's important to be positive. Even though it's easier said than done. The truth is, we, as writers, are often too harsh on ourselves and on our novels when in reality it isn't that bad. 

This fear is only natural because you're putting yourself out there for everyone to see. Your giving them piece of yourself and they will either like it or not. Just be aware that we cannot make everybody happy. We're all different. 

Those were my fears of writing, what are yours? Let me know in the comments. Also, did you find yourself in some of these? What do you do when someone asks you what's your story about? Do you doubt your writing?